Crazy rumors are a staple of the NFL offseason.
But what’s better than a crazy rumor? A crazy rumor with a crazy source.
On Tuesday, one such rumor made its way to Cincinnati, claiming that the Bengals were on the verge of trading for Minnesota Vikings All-Pro wide receiver Justin Jefferson. The source? An alleged co-worker of Bengals quarterback Joe Burrow’s girlfriend, who was apparently gossiping in the breakroom that her boyfriend’s team was about to trade for the 2022 NFL Offensive Player of the Year.
“There’s a dude in the community that said his girl works at Krogers with Burrow’s girlfriend and she said they’re in deep negotiations,” reads the screenshot of a text message conversation shared by Bengals fan @dpainclainon on X (formerly Twitter). “He said it would be Tee [Higgins] and 2 firsts for JJ and Burrow has agreed to restructure his contract so JJ and [Ja’Marr] Chase would both get 3 years $100 million.”
For good measure, the Bengals fan included a screenshot of Burrow’s girlfriend’s LinkedIn page to prove that she does, in fact, work at the headquarters of the Cincinnati-based grocery chain Kroger (no ‘S’).
Sources are telling me the Justin Jefferson to Cincinnati rumors are real 👀 pic.twitter.com/h56lqrxwXI
— WHO DEY est. 2000 (@dpainclain) March 12, 2024
For what it’s worth, @dpainclainon lists “comedy” in his X bio (behind football, of course), so perhaps this was his attempt at doing a bit. In any event, his post took off with more than 400 retweets and 889 views, which led to the Bengals’ own X account acknowledging the alleged rumor.
“Twitter has now reached ‘My friend at Kroger…’ rumors,” the Bengals posted. “Free agency is wild.”
Twitter has now reached "My friend at Kroger…" rumors.
Free agency is wild.
— Cincinnati Bengals (@Bengals) March 13, 2024
While seemingly every team’s social media account has had a personality for a decade now, it’s pretty funny to see one acknowledge a far-fetched rumor like the Bengals trading for Jefferson. Although the idea of the star wide receiver re-teaming with his former LSU teammates Burrow and Chase is certainly intriguing, it’s not only hard to imagine that the Vikings would trade Jefferson, but also that all three former Tigers would take pay cuts in their prime to help facilitate such a deal.
But in the off-chance that the 24-year-old wide receiver does wind up in the Queen City, then this post from the Bengals — and the one from @dpainclainon — will become the stuff of legends.
Hey, crazier things have happened. Just ask the cupcake shop owner who broke the news of LeBron James’ return to Cleveland.
