Did you hear Alex Rodriguez played at 3rd base for the New York Yankees last night? Apparently Rodriguez's 211 game suspension, appeal, and existence in the Yankees lineup is the major story out of the Biogenesis scandal and not Everth Cabrera. Who would have thunk it.
In spite of all the other stories in sports happening right now, Rodriguez dominated yesterday's news cycle. Correction: he obliterated it. The A-Rod saga and the attention paid to him could only be matched by Tim Tebow paying for Johnny Manziel's autograph. With that in mind, the last thing we need is another hot sports take on the A-Rod suspension. What we need is some laughs at the situation's expense because after all, there are more important things in life. Like Shark Week.
As always these are Real Tweets from Real People…
.@ARod Look on the bright side, it's Shark Week
— Fake Bo Pelini (@FauxPelini) August 6, 2013
Alex Rodriguez has made $353 million dollars playing Major League Baseball. Let this be a lesson to all you kids out there: don't do drugs.
— Mike E. (@slickdickson) August 6, 2013
Even Johnny Manziel has to be booing @AROD somewhere (drunk) tonight.
— Peyton's Head (@PeytonsHead) August 6, 2013
I would like to hear more about Alex Rodriguez. There's not enough coverage. Rectify this with your best columns, twitter.
— JP Starkey (@jpstarkey) August 6, 2013
I look forward to Russia granting Alex Rodriguez political asylum in the upcoming days.
— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) August 5, 2013
Tonight: "MLB suspended A-Rod for a total of 211 games–otherwise known as 'What A Single Baseball Game Feels Like.'" @ColbertReport, 11:30p
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) August 6, 2013
I think A-Rod should just go play QB for Texas A&M and Johnny Manziel should play third base for the Yankees. #ProblemSolved
— Rich Eisen (@richeisen) August 5, 2013
A-Rod gets a bloop single. #VINDICATED
— SportsPickle (@sportspickle) August 6, 2013
If only we could give A-Rod a nickname that remarked on his disingenuous nature. I got it: A-FAKE.
— Drew Magary (@drewmagary) August 5, 2013
— Eli Langer (@EliLanger) August 6, 2013
Yankees fans are reminded that they can trade in their Alex Rodriguez jerseys for the love they never got as children.
— sir broosk (@celebrityhottub) August 5, 2013
YKNOW IF THIS ALEX MARTINEZ GUY IN BASEBALL TESTED POSITIVE FOR STEROIDS HE SHOULD BE SUSPENDED, WHATS ALL THIS FUSS ABOUT EH? LET'S GO!
— Don Cherry Parody (@DonCherryParody) August 5, 2013
— Ben Heisler (@bennyheis) August 6, 2013
A-Rod found someone who believes he's not guilty. pic.twitter.com/92lGrqpgY7
— Toucher and Rich (@Toucherandrich) August 6, 2013
"That was Friday night. Today is another day" – @AROD explaining how days work.
— Jay Onrait (@JayOnrait) August 5, 2013
its all madonnas fault. every athlete she has been with has gone bad. see canseco, rodman and now rodriguez lol lol lol
— Ozzie Guillen FND (@OzzieGuillen) August 5, 2013
And this is all you need to know about the A-Rod saga. Ozzie Guillen has emerged as the voice of reason.