There are not words to describe the debacle that was Saturday Night Football. I think I’m in the minority here, but I’ve always had the NFL Network since its inception in 2003. I’ve always enjoyed the channel. Especially when the Combine is in full swing (there’s nothing like watching 75 different players do the 40 in a span of five minutes).

Well for those of you who DO NOT get the NFL Network you missed perhaps the funniest broadcast I’ve ever witnessed in my life. In fact it was so funny I should have started live-blogging (punching myself in the head repeatedly).

Dick Vermeil had such bad laryngitis that even BEFORE the game he was falling apart. And considering that he was going to spend his entire night talking……..this wasn’t going to end good.

Dick barely made it through the first half (as did I), and the NFL Network decided to ingeniously sub in Marshall “What You Talkin Bout” Faulk and then later add Deion Sanders into the mix. And with these changes the NFL Network inadvertently created the first 3-man African American Announcing Team.

The biggest travesty of the night was not Vermeil, nor Marshall, nor Deion, nor Gregory Gumbel… it was the fact that I had to go to a holiday party during the second half. It was like one of those moments in high school where everyone is telling a huge secret. Someone goes to tell you….and as you are waiting in extreme anticipation they drop this bomb on you. “Oh wait…..No…….I can’t tell YOU!”. And they walk away. That’s how I felt after learning I would not be able to listen to the rest of the game.

Well you know what F them. And F the people who think listening to David Bowie’s version of Little Drummer Boy is more important than laughing at the demise of the NFL Network. I mean what was I supposed to do??? Huh? Ruin Christmas??? (Dammit….you’re right. I should have.)

More important than “Throat Gate” (trademarked by me bitches!) is the fact that Bryant Gumbel is just plain AWFUL! Real Sports is far and above the best sports related show on television. It blows Outside the Lines out of the water. But you can’t bring that “low-key”/somber tone and attitude into a broadcast of perhaps the most violent game in the world. It’s not going to work.

Also saying things like, “The Shot Clock is running out”- BG, when it’s actually called the PLAY Clock in Football……isn’t going to help either.

Why Your Analyst Can’t Have Laryngitis (Scott’s Shots)


Bevo has left a new comment on your post “Dick Vermeil……Wow.“:

I too love the NFL network especially their replay of games. Too bad you missed the second half because it blew the roof off the unintentional comedy scale. Vermeil refused to talk to Gumbel. Refused. Does anyone know what in the hell Marshall Faulk is talking about? He is worse than Eric Dickerson, who at least could complete a coherent sentence. Marshall, baby, take the damn marbles out of your mouth, watch the game, and provide some witty story that is more than tangentially elated to the play we saw. Deon Sanders would not shut the hell up. No wonder he was fired by CBS. How about this for a show on the WWL? Sanders and STEPHEN A. SMITH on the same set.

Damn you Bevo! I knew I missed comedy golf by getting dressed up in a sweater and drinking Nog-asakis with random people. Thanks for the comment though, and if anyone has anything to add……throw it in the ‘ments.