An internal ESPN memo was leaked to John Koblin yesterday detailing ESPN's strict social media policy.  With ESPNers daring to (gasp!) speak out and offer personal opinions publicly, ESPN executives have to be diligent in slapping wrists, wagging fingers, and shooting stern looks.  After all, ESPN can't afford another reckless firebrand like Bill Simmons to do anything crazy on Twitter like criticize Skip Bayless.  ESPN can't afford such outlandish things as people engaging with critics or fans, discussing sports without the sanctioning of ESPN, or offering any opinions about anything.

It must be difficult for ESPN to track so many potential offendors of their social media policy with hundreds of employees active on social media.  Nearly every tweet sent could be a possible violation worthy of suspension or worse.  With that in mind, we want to help the Bristol social media police and bring to light just a few violators of ESPN's social media policy from the past couple days.  Ya know, just in case they missed anybody.  We're here to do what little we can to assist ESPN in this quest to clamp down on needless expression and individualism.  

Subject: Dan Le Batard

Violation: Defending your work and engaging with critics, even if it's sarcastically talking about your own Twitter fight which may or may not have contributed to the timing of the latest social media memo.

Subject: Scott Van Pelt

Violation: Engaging in media criticism AND exercising discretion, thoughtfulness, and respect for ESPN fans.  Two for the price of one.  Oh you better believe that's a paddlin!

Subject: Robert Flores

Violation: This is not on the updated list of ESPN commentator endorsements, and thus not sanctioned by ESPN.

Subject: Jay Bilas

Violation: Linking to Deadspin, obviously.

Subject: Taylor Twellman

Violation: Disparaging remarks about competitors.

Subject: Linda Cohn

Violation: ESPN does not sanction NHL discussion.

Subject: John Buccigross

Violation: Avoid discussing future coverage plans.

Subject: Bill Simmons

Violation: No speculating on sports topics.

Subject: Kevin Negandhi

Violation: No personal opinions on sports topics.

Subject: Chris McKendry

Violation: No personal opinions on sports topics.

Subject: Chris Fowler

Violation: No personal opinions on local Mississippi eateries.

Subject: Bill Simmons

Violation: No personal opinions on 70's sports movies that maintain cultural relevance.

Subject: Dick Vitale

Violation: No personal opinions on legends of Motown.

For approved tweets, see thisthis, this, and especially this or this for examples.

About Matt Yoder

Award winning sportswriter at The Comeback and Awful Announcing. The biggest cat in the whole wide world.

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