Of course, the Pammies are our lifeblood during the Fall and our focus largely resides with your feedback for college football.  The Pammies have a steep history here at AA, but we receive just as many tweets from you on NFL Sundays that we do on college football Saturdays.  So, what better way to provide a weekly dose of the best NFL quotes than by one of our favorite series at AA – Real Tweets from Real People.  Al Michaels is already creepily excited.  Each week, we’ll spotlight a few NFL announcers (mostly Dick Stockton) and some of the best zingers from around Twitter.  As always, these are Real Tweets from Real People…

#Dick Stockton (Lions vs Vikings)

Dascenzo Dick Stockton jukes from one sentence to another like Barry Sanders in his prime.
jpcadorin Good news: The Vikings aren’t panicking up 3-0, 7 minutes in to the game. Really Dick Stockton?
joshfrank @awfulannouncing another Dick Stockton gem was when he announced Ndamakung Suh as ndamakung Kuhn in pregame
Kyle_R_Dufrane @awfulannouncing I assume you don’t bother tweeting about how consistently horrible Dick Stockton is because you only have 140 characters?
vlamb24 @awfulannouncing Dick Stockton called Stafford Jason Hanson…too bad the Lions weren’t punting.
myguythetorg Dick Stockton has no clue what he is saying. A 1st and 5 is 3rd and long and minnesota is 2 and 0? Take ur meds Dick
BKibbs Dick Stockton said that the Eagles were “America’s Team when the season started.” I’m sorry, Dick, what America do you live in?
Detroit4lyfe According to Dick Stockton, the Lions defense has held the Lions offense to 2 field goals today.

#Jim Mora (Bengals vs 49ers)

BASportsGuy Great how Fox shows the worst possible angle on that illegal touching replay, and Jim Mora praises the amazing camerawork.
yougomango Jim Mora Jr is like, um, the worst color guy I’ve ever heard maybe??
mikekiessel If the 49ers Bengal game was played in my backyard I wouldn’t open drapes. If Jim Mora was here to announce I’d call cops for tresspassing
greebs “There might be some frustrated #49ers fans watching right now…” Jim Mora. Get this guy a Peabody! @awfulannouncing
greebs Alex Smith throws the ball five feet over Joshua Morgan’s head. “That’s an accuracy issue there, Ron” says Jim Mora. Thanks, Jim.

#Dan Dierdorf (Texans vs Saints)

msthierry110 “Defeat, thy name is field goal”…Dan Dierdorf
awfulannouncing Dan Dierdorf just made reference to “Texans Nation.” In other news, I just vomited.
Chris_Hill_ If Dan Dierdorf got attacked by a badger I would probably have a good laugh.
djbmilk “Brees is such a competitor. He would chew his own leg off to get a win. He’s probably eating himself from the inside right now” Dan Dierdorf
awfulannouncing By the way, I wanted to tweet all Dan Dierdorf’s food references during the Saints game today, but it would have put Twitter over capacity.

#Joe Buck & Troy Aikman (Bears vs Packers)

Pat_Armitage Will Joe Buck raise his voice at all this afternoon? That is the question. The NFL announcing equivalent of Ben Stein. CC:@awfulannouncing
ThaSportsChick if Joe Buck HAS to be a commentator for a sport, why cant it be snooker or really bad hunting shows, you know, something i can turn off.
nsatts52 Troy Aikman has to be one of the worst color men in all of sports right now. He is brutal to listen to, which makes Joe Buck even worse too
twhurt The worst thing about being a fan of the best team in the NFL is that Joe Buck will call most of your games.
poopd1ck Joe Buck has the charisma of a dead fly.

#Brian Billick (Bucs vs Falcons)

JohnLiotta What does “runs angry after the catch” even mean, Brian Billick? @awfulannouncing Also just said: “We’d be dog cussing Matt Ryan.”
Kayne_Gibson @awfulannouncing Billick after Josh Freeman QB sneak for td: “Let the big guy just shove it in.”
aphoward13 Someone needs to explain the helmet-to-helmet rule to Brian Billick. Brennaman knows it better @awfulannouncing
AllSnark “Once again, I fail terribly as an official” – Brian Billick. Truer words never spoken @awfulannouncing
lawlornfl Brian Billick is painfully bad as an announcer. He’s full of wrong info.

#Cris Collinsworth (Steelers vs Colts)

bjo109@awfulannouncing collinsworth: “since painter’s lifetime qb rating is close to 10, that’s not good.” thanks cris..
ashlii0203 “He drops as many balls as anyone in the league.” – Cris Collinsworth @awfulannouncing
AllSnark “There’s only a handful of guys that can do what Peyton Manning can do.” – Cris Collinsworth @awfulannouncing Steelers vs Colts

#Other Games

ERuss24 @awfulannouncing can we nominate Curt Menafee for thanking “Hugh Jackson” for doing the opening for Fox NFL this week?
FontibonCeez @awfulannouncing Siragusa just compared McCoy to Barry Sanders – you kidding me!?
Got_Next @awfulannouncing John Lynch is all over the place tonight; talking about Marino Rivera and ish. Get him outta the booth.
wchandlerparker @awfulannouncing whoever the analyst is on the jags/panthers game has been beyond awful today [It was Steve Beuerlein]
ProfessorDrew That’s right, Daryl Johnston, generally when guys can’t tackle it makes them poor tacklers @awfulannouncing
bobbyd1222 @awfulannouncing if English had no S’s or th’s Shannon Sharpe would be HOF material. But, alas…

About Matt Yoder

Award winning sportswriter at The Comeback and Awful Announcing. The biggest cat in the whole wide world.