Colin Cowherd

Last month, Colin Cowherd gave us his “best take ever” and this week, the Fox Sports Radio host may have created his best analogy ever.

Realistically, it probably wasn’t the best. At least not for the radio host who once compared himself to Donald Trump, Khalil Mack to Apple Stock, and juiced baseball players to porno stars using Viagra, but Cowherd still hit his audience with a doozy on Monday.

With the Dallas Cowboys sneaking past the Houston Texans Sunday afternoon for their 10th win of the season, bandwagoners are buying high on America’s Team. But not Cowherd, who learned to play the market better after regretfully selling his Apple stock in 1990. According to Cowherd, the Dak Prescott-led Cowboys aren’t legit Super Bowl contenders, they’re just an Adam Sandler movie.

“I don’t go high and low on the Cowboys,” Cowherd said. “They’re an Adam Sandler film. I kinda know what I’m getting. It’s not gonna win an Oscar. Some are better than others. Sometimes you’re like, ‘Uncut Gems, that was pretty good!’ And other times you’re watching and eight minutes in you’re like, ‘they don’t have a storyline’…I don’t get high, I don’t get low.”

That’s a solid analogy from Cowherd. The Cowboys and Sandler continue to garner a lot of hype for what they did in the ‘90s, and despite occasionally reliving glimpses of their prime, they’ve both failed to meet expectations for decades.

Cowherd, however, continues to deliver analogies like he’s in his prime. Critics will cite his poor track record of predicting the future, but those who can’t help from listening to Cowherd will point to his analogies. Throughout his career, Cowherd has established himself as the foremost expert in sports radio on giving ridiculously absurd analogies. Surprisingly, it’s a talent no other host can figure out how to match, in an industry where personalities are constantly mimicking those who are most successful.

[The Herd]

About Brandon Contes

Brandon Contes is a staff writer for Awful Announcing and The Comeback. He previously helped carve the sports vertical for Mediaite and spent more than three years with Barrett Sports Media. Send tips/comments/complaints to bcontes@thecomeback.com