It was a tough week for NFL fans who value common sense.
Not once, but twice during Week 15, NFL players — professional football athletes who have reached the pinnacle of their craft and get paid millions of dollars a year — quite literally dropped the ball. In what has become a full-on epidemic, both Jordan Battle of the Cincinnati Bengals and Jonathan Taylor of the Indianapolis Colts dropped the football before crossing the goal line on Sunday, each costing their team six points.
And if seeing the best players in the world continually make the dumbest error possible makes you question how this is such a regular occurrence, you’re not alone.
Bill Simmons of The Ringer had one explanation for the phenomenon on his eponymous show Sunday night.
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“Do people blackout when they’re about to score?” Simmons began. “It’s the only thing I can think of. Is it like having an orgasm? Where you just kind of lose perspective, like brraaahhahhhahhhhh, and you just lose the ball? What other explanation could there be? Do you literally, like, blackout?”
Does Simmons have a point here? If you can look past his…interesting take on what an orgasm sounds like, he just might be on to something. There are very few instances throughout a person’s life where they lose all control. Climaxing is one. And right before you cross the goal line for a touchdown, seems to be another.
Simmons’ co-host Cousin Sal seemed to concur.
“Like, this doesn’t happen in other sports,” Cousin Sal said. “Like, Juan Soto’s not rounding third, and then when he’s between third and home, he takes off for the dugout.”
“The thing is, it’s not like this happens once every seven years,” Simmons continued. “This happens like four times a year in college and pro football. It feels like it happens once a month, right?”
He’s not wrong. Just over a month ago, New York Jets wide receiver Malachi Corley did the same thing in a nationally televised game.
When will these guys learn?
About Drew Lerner
Drew Lerner is a staff writer for Awful Announcing and an aspiring cable subscriber. He previously covered sports media for Sports Media Watch. Future beat writer for the Oasis reunion tour.