Jeff Saturday knows a lot about bizarre head coaching hires, but the Dallas Cowboys introductory press conference for Brian Schottenheimer really caught him by surprise.
Usually, it’s the incoming coach who wins or loses the introductory press conference. But Jerry Jones and Stephen Jones did Schottenheimer a solid Monday afternoon by being the ones who lost the press conference for the Cowboys.
Tuesday morning on First Take, Saturday admitted he couldn’t stop watching the Cowboys as they introduced Brian Schottenheimer, the same way rubberneckers can’t help from staring at a car crash.
Former Indianapolis Colts head coach Jeff Saturday seemed baffled by the Dallas Cowboys introductory press conference for Brian Schottenheimer pic.twitter.com/Y1UbBd2rxU
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“I’m not a huge social media guy, I watched eight minutes on my phone of this thing. Because I was awestruck,” Saturday said. “I couldn’t believe it, I was thinking to myself, the man (Schottenheimer) is sitting a foot from you (Jerry Jones) and you’re talking about him like, ‘It’s not glamorous… it’s the biggest risk.’ And then you have Stephen on the other side giving the air quote on the quote “drought” that they’re not in? The whole thing seems like bizarro world.”
Jeff Saturday was part of a bizarro world introductory press conference two seasons ago, when the Indianapolis Colts plucked him from ESPN to be their interim head coach. But here he is back with ESPN, watching the Cowboys dub their new head coach a “less than glamorous hire” while introducing him to the media.
It was the air quotes around the word “drought” that really got Saturday, who later noted Dallas has the longest championship game drought in the NFC at 30 years and counting. Three decades is a drought that needs no air quotes, especially when the next longest lull is the Chicago Bears, who haven’t been to a championship game in 15 years.
“What don’t they understand about the only constant that has been for the 20 or 30 years is them?” Saturday asked. “Everything else has changed. Coaches have changed. Players have changed. They have stayed consistent. And I’m not saying everything they’ve done is wrong or poor. They’ve put together some good teams. But not the teams that have done what the Cowboys fans expect, which is NFC Championship Game or Super Bowl. That is a major problem.”
The biggest issue with the Cowboys is that Jerry and Stephen Jones don’t understand they’re the constant. Everyone else sees Jerry Jones’ meddling, their unorthodox organizational structure, lack of free agency spending, and embarrassing press conferences as reasons why they’re a fumbling franchise. But their 82-year-old owner doesn’t see it.

About Brandon Contes
Brandon Contes is a staff writer for Awful Announcing and The Comeback. He previously helped carve the sports vertical for Mediaite and spent more than three years with Barrett Sports Media. Send tips/comments/complaints to bcontes@thecomeback.com
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