An Awful Announcing rendering of Chris "Mad Dog" Russo and Howard Stern. An Awful Announcing rendering of Chris “Mad Dog” Russo and Howard Stern.

Chris “Mad Dog” Russo botched his NLCS prediction, he botched his retirement, and he botched one of his strongest allies in Howard Stern.

Last week, Russo wagered his career on the NLCS, vowing to retire if the Philadelphia Phillies didn’t advance to the World Series. And despite doubling and tripling down on the wager, Russo promptly backpedaled away from the bet after the Arizona Diamondbacks beat Philly in seven games.

The next morning, Russo went on Stern, seeking help for how to get out of the hole he dug himself in. Stern came up with the theory that the only way to make people forget about the retirement vow is by doing something even more outrageous.

After nixing a few ideas, Russo agreed to walk a block in Manhattan while wearing a Diamondbacks branded bikini. Apparently, less than a week after agreeing to do the bikini punishment, Russo has once again reneged on his promise and Stern’s listeners aren’t thrilled.

“My listeners are furious with Mad Dog for pulling out his obligation to make good on a walk of shame punishment,” Stern said this week before reading some angry emails from his audience.

“Listen, I’m out of this Mad Dog thing,” Stern continued. “I don’t want to be involved in it anymore. I offered him a solution.”

Stern offered Russo a solution. Russo accepted, and then he bailed, subsequently turning on one of his strongest allies in Howard Stern. As Stern’s listeners suggested he organize a roast, refer to Dog only as “Mad Fraud Russo,” convince Sirius to fire the radio legend, or make him streak at the Broadcasting Hall of Fame, the King of All Media sounded ready to move on.

“I’m really fond of the guy, but he really f*cked up,” Stern said. “I’m out of it. I don’t care. He can do whatever he wants. Let him deal with it.”

Russo reneging on the schticky radio bit with Stern probably won’t spark the same reaction that reneging on his retirement did. More people seemed to be clamoring for Russo to make good on his retirement promise than they were clamoring to see him strut through Manhattan wearing a bikini. For those who are now thankful Russo in a bikini won’t be plastered all over social media, apparently you have Stephen A. Smith to thank.

Last week, Smith said he had a private conversation with Stern about Russo’s looming bikini punishment. And Wednesday morning on First Take, he acknowledged speaking with Stern “to prevent the American public from being subjected” to the bikini punishment. Smith continues to put Russo on ESPN despite his vow to retire, but at least he saved the world from having to see the 64-year-old sports entertainer in a bikini.


About Brandon Contes

Brandon Contes is a staff writer for Awful Announcing and The Comeback. He previously helped carve the sports vertical for Mediaite and spent more than three years with Barrett Sports Media. Send tips/comments/complaints to