Rob Parker is openly rooting for Bill Belichick to fail at North Carolina

Deion Sanders accused reporters of rooting for Colorado to fail.

He wasn’t entirely wrong, but nobody in sports media was willing to put their name on it. Sanders clearly rubbed a specific subsection of the media the wrong way with his antics. The old guard complained that a college head coach wasn’t supposed to behave in the manner he did.

But he did.  And people hate-watched Sanders, anyway, just like they will with Bill Belichick.

But Bill Belichick’s a different story. There are many similarities, especially in ESPN’s coverage, but where they differ is that we have a sports media member who openly roots for Belichick to fail. Now, some would argue that was the case with unearthing every detail about his relationship with the 24-year-old Jordon Hudson, but that was journalism.

Pablo Torre was merely finding out. Rob Parker is just being a fan.

“I’m openly rooting for Bill Belichick to fail at North Carolina,” Parker said this week on Fox Sports Radio’s The Odd Couple. “I have nothing personal against Bill Belichick. I don’t know the guy. He’s never done anything to me wrong. I know people always say, ‘What did he sleep with your wife? Why are you so anti this or that?’ No! I don’t know the man personally. It ain’t about the cheating that he did in New England. That ain’t the reason.”

Parker’s objections aren’t about Spygate or Deflategate. They’re about what’s happening right now at North Carolina, where Belichick has assembled a staff that reads like a family reunion mixed with a Patriots alumni catalog. His girlfriend, Jordon Hudson, appears to have significant influence over program decisions, and the couple has already lined up a Hulu documentary to chronicle their first season.

“It’s the stuff at North Carolina that I’m rooting against,” Parker continued. “You know what I’m rooting against? Nepotism. Cronyism. Look at his staff — friends, family, kids, all this stuff. I’m rooting against nepotism.”

The elephant in the room, the Jordon Hudson situation, particularly bothers the ex-ESPNer, who pointed out the obvious contrast with Belichick’s previous relationship.

“I’m rooting against his girlfriend being in the huddle, or being on the field,” he said. “Bill Belichick is 73 years old. I don’t remember ever seeing his wife on the sidelines during a game. Tell me I’m wrong. Have you ever seen her? She was Casper the Ghost if she was out there because I never saw her. And this girlfriend is sashaying up and down.”

Belichick’s debut didn’t exactly help his case. North Carolina was demolished 48-14 by TCU in a game that became uncompetitive after the first quarter. The postgame press conference turned into a social media circus when Belichick answered questions surrounded by balloons and decorations that looked like a kid’s birthday party. People immediately started wondering if Hudson was behind the setup.

TCU’s social media team had a field day. They kept receipts on analysts who praised Belichick early in the game, mocked the upcoming Hulu documentary, and basically treated the whole North Carolina experiment like a joke.

Parker sees the documentary as part of the problem.

“And the other part is them trying to make money off the Hulu documentary,” he said. “Like, coach football. That stuff should come, and it comes if you want to turn this program around, but not the other stuff. And then, the last thing, they had the gall, the audacity to go get a trademark for ‘gold digger’? They should’ve got a trademark for ‘Golden Corral,’ because that’s where she would be working if it weren’t for Bill. How ’bout that?”

The trademark reference highlights another bizarre aspect of the Belichick-Hudson partnership. Through their company, TCE Rights Management, they’ve filed nearly 20 trademark requests, including one for “gold digger,”  apparently an attempt to monetize the insult commonly directed at their relationship. Other requests include “Chapel Bill,” “The Belichick Way,” and various “Bill’s Version” trademarks that mirror Taylor Swift’s strategy for reclaiming her music rights.

“So, I’m against all of that,” Parker concluded. “I’m on the record. I want North Carolina to lose every game Bill Belichick is involved in, because Rob Parker is anti-nepotism, anti-your girlfriend running the football team when she has no business being out there, anti-making money and doing all this other stuff when you haven’t done jack at Chapel Hill.”

Parker isn’t pretending to be objective here. He’s doing something we rarely see in sports media.

“I’m telling you right now, I’m openly hoping that this winds up being a total disaster for Bill Belichick,” he said.

That puts Parker in a completely different category from the members of the media that Sanders called out. Those people at least maintained the pretense of journalistic objectivity while clearly wanting Colorado to struggle. Parker has ditched that entirely.

You can call it refreshingly honest or completely unprofessional. Either way, based on how North Carolina looked against TCU, Parker might not have to wait long to see if he gets what he’s hoping for.