There have been quite a few insane takes from callers on The Paul Finebaum Show over the years. Some of those have even led to real-world trouble, as with Auburn tree poisoner “Al from Dadeville” (Harvey Updyke Jr., who eventually wound up spending eight months in jail and was ordered to pay $800,000 over that), which Finebaum cited in 2020 as “the singular most memorable moment I’ve ever had.” But a more serious crime still was suggested on Finebaum’s show on SEC Network Thursday, with caller “Roger in Texas” seemingly proposing the assassination of Texas A&M Aggies football head coach Jimbo Fisher:
"Paul Finebaum Show" caller "Roger in Texas" said "As far as Jimbo's contract, that $90 million contract, a hit man costs a lot less than that. Thank you and have a great afternoon." pic.twitter.com/nl8pyVzelt
— Awful Announcing (@awfulannouncing) October 6, 2022
Part of what’s incredible there is that this was the second point that “Roger” raised. Before this, he went off on Alabama coach Nick Saban, saying “First Saban said during his conference that fans were an external factor and meant nothing and contributed nothing to the outcome of the game, which sounded like to me that he doesn’t care about his fans, his fan base or whether they come to the game or not. So I suggest to them that they quit building statues and bending their knee and giving their undying devotion to him.”
“Roger” then followed that up with his Fisher take: “As far as Jimbo’s contract, that $90 million contract, a hitman costs a lot less than that.” And he ended with “Thank you and have a great afternoon.” And Finebaum seemed stunned by that (appropriately), staying silent for a few seconds, then responding with “I’m still trying to figure out what he said.” And then he moved on to his next caller, “Tyler,” who asked “Do you know any good hitmen?” Finebaum responded, “I really, uh, my Rolodex, there’s a dearth of hitmen in my Rolodex at the moment.”
Finebaum’s next caller asked about hitmen after this, and he responded with “There’s a dearth of hitmen in my Rolodex at the moment.” pic.twitter.com/5nU18J8gk6
— Awful Announcing (@awfulannouncing) October 6, 2022
We thank Finebaum for providing yet more proof of the insanity that sometimes shows up in the college football world, and for adding some fuel to the fire of the once-prophesied Fisher-Saban rivalry. That game has been drawing less interest lately than it did around those coaches’ comments on each other this offseason, but “trying to take out a hit on a coach on national television” might bring some of that back.
Update: An ESPN spokesperson provided this comment:
“We take all threats seriously, implied or otherwise, and look into them accordingly. Comments such as these are wholly unacceptable.”
[Screengrab via Awful Announcing on Twitter]