New England Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady may be under fire from many sides in the Deflategate saga, but he picked up an unusual defender Wednesday: Canadian hockey commentator Don Cherry (who, it should be noted, is a former coach of the Boston Bruins who still wears ties from that team). Cherry’s Twitter account is known for long multi-tweet rants, and he unleashed an amazing one about Brady and the Patriots Wednesday afternoon, saying that because Brady is “rich, good-looking, married to a supermodel” and “the greatest quarterback who ever lived,” he’d have no need to cheat, and also getting the identity of the Deflategate game wrong (it was the AFC championship against the Indianapolis Colts in question, not the Super Bowl against the Seattle Seahawks):

This is pretty much the perfect Don Cherry bingo card, covering accusations of media agendas against certain successful players, unrelated off-the-field characterizations of athletes, incorrect facts (accusations about Seattle rather than Indianapolis), name-dropping of the athletes he talks to, unrelated anecdotal evidence (“baseball has the umps keep the balls!”), lower-down scapegoats, hyperbole (“the greatest quarterback who ever lived”) and repeated phrases (“give your head a shake”). If only there was a way for him to blame this on European players or women being allowed in dressing rooms

No one’s going to hire Cherry for his NFL analysis any time soon (although putting him and Deion Sanders together might create a wardrobe explosion that destroys a few cameras), but thanks to Twitter, we all can see his glorious rants on non-hockey subjects, 140 characters at a time. Hey, maybe that other noted Brady defender and Boston sports guy should have Cherry on a podcast sometime…

[H/T to Patrick Johnston]

About Andrew Bucholtz

Andrew Bucholtz is a staff writer for Awful Announcing.

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