Philadelphia: In Donny We Trust.

Akers kicks off to Danyel Manning, who comes out to the 28 yard line. A quick three and out punctuated by an incompletion to Marty Booker, and Brad Maynard will punt again. DeSean Jackson lets it bounce, and it heads back to the 6, where it’s downed.

Donny Mac talks about his homecoming to Kanye West in the background. He throws to Brown for an eight-yard gain, while John and Al ramble on about baseball. Correll Buckhalter rumbles for 24 yards out to about the 45. McNabb throws a pick to Kevin Kane — who returns it all the way to the Eagles’ 10 when Buckhalter tackles him — and Buckhalter’s hurt, which the Eagles do not need with Westbrook out.

On 2nd down, Orton throws and it’s picked in the end zone. Eagle ball, back at the 20.

Blackhawks, winners? huh? – Not a Blackhawks Fan
What the hell is McNabb talking about? The Cubs and Blackhawks have the longest championship droughts in their sports – the Bulls have sucked since MJ – the Bears have been living off one year for two decades. A town of winners? my ass. – Gibbon Jockey

Lorenzo Booker rushes up the middle for a couple yards, and I bet there’s a rush on both Yahoo and ESPN to pick him up off waivers. Jackson drops the 2nd and six pass, as Andrea Kremer tells us Buckhalter’s got a lower back contusion. 3rd and six is incomplete, and the Eagles will punt it away — Hester picks that sucker up and runs backwards to get it. He’s out at the 2.

Rex Grossman has a grin on his face, is warming up, and as we speak, is bribing Lovie with (muffle muffle muffle garble) to get in the game after that Orton pick. – SSReporters

This game almost demands a Sex Cannon appearance. Forte loses two on the carry, and the Bears are at their own 1 on 2nd down. Orton’s pass got knocked down by either Gocong or Omar Gaither. 3rd down rush goes nowhere, and Maynard punts from the back of his end zone. DeSean Jackson brings it back to the Bears’ 35.

Lorenzo Booker just got pasted by Lance Briggs on that 2nd down pass. 3rd and 13 — and it goes to Selleck, the tight end. Not enough for the first, but enough to get Akers out there, maybe?

Between Booker, Buckhalter and Westbrook, don’t you think science could create one running back who could stay healthy for 16 games plus playoffs? Isn’t this what the Philadelphia Experiment was all about? – Rob in WI

All my RBs are hurt, so I have to throw on every down. After all these years, Andy Reid finally can execute his perfect game plan. – JG

After seeing the shot of Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore next to him, all I can say is Gale Sayers needs to find a new posse. – Jim Williams

Akers’ kick bounces off the upright, no score.

“There’s your doink.” – Al
“That’s a doink.” – John

And we go to break on “You Dropped a Bomb on Me”, which I’m fairly sure is the Gap Band.

That’s how many turnovers by Orton the past few plays? Trent Cole smacks the ball out of his hands and Omar Gaither picks it up. Philly ball on the Chicago 28.

FUMBLE…and now “Orton Hears A Boo” – Jim Williams

+1 fish, 2 fish, red fish, blue fish.

Donny Mac converts the latest third down by hitting Jason Avant. He then hits Celek for another six yards. Shovel pass to Avant near the first down marker at the Bears’ 3, and it is a first down.

No catches for Hank Baskett so far? Kendra Wilkinson is disappointed. McNabb aims for Baskett, but it’s incomplete and thrown into double coverage. D-Mac covers up after tripping on his lineman’s foot. 3rd down pass is incomplete, busted up by Nathan Vasher. Let’s see if Akers can actually hit this kick.

Up and good, 21-17, Bears.

Akers kicks to Hester, and he busts it all the way to midfield when Akers busts him in the gut for a tackle — losing his helmet. Orton hits Greg Olsen for three yards. Forte pushes for three more. Bears wind up punting, Jackson fair catches at the 17.

Next week: The Glove vs. Silky Garrard, in that hub of football known as Jacksonville.

After a Jackson catch, it’s 3rd and 3 for the Eagles on their own 24. The pass to Brown is broken up. PUNTING IS WINNING!

Hester gets tackled at the Chicago 35 on the punt. Kevin Jones suffers a bout of FUMBLEITIS, and it’s Philly ball again. That’s three or four Chicago turnovers, right? Al says four. Buckhalter’s back, and he rushes outside for four yards. Jackson gets the handoff on the next play and rushes all the way to the Chicago 15.

Hunter Hillenmeyer destroys McNabb on that 1st down, as someone blew a blocking assignment. Buckhalter gets back to the 20, 3rd and 15 now. Short gain to Avant, and here comes Akers again.

With all the Bears turnovers and punts, and the Eagles throwing on every down this game might not be over until sunrise. – JG

Most of find this to be rapidly declining football. The Browns and Bengals, however, find this to be championship calibur play. – Jim Williams

“They’re going to try and knock the Eagles out of field goal position.” – John

The Bears 24 yard line? Really? – SSReporters

Kick is up and good, 21-20, Bears.

Chicago starts on its 41 yard line and I’m going to say this drive will end in a pick this time. So now, the clock is having issues along with both offenses, conspiring to keep us watching the game longer.

“The scoreboard is frozen, much like the credit markets.” – Al

Marty Booker took the end around up to the Bears 43. 2nd and 7 is incomplete. Orton checks off the play and gets a first down with a screen pass to Matt Forte. Hester gets to the Philly 26 on another end around play. He gets snubbed on 1st down, Orton throws it away on 2nd down. Omar Gaither rushes and the 3rd down pass is incomplete…Robbie Gould on for the FG try…from 41 yards out….it is good. 24-20, Bears.

Demps returns it to the 24.

“McNabb’s going to try to bail the Eagles out.” – Al

Buckhalter runs to the 46 after getting sprung on a nice block. The ball keeps moving as McNabb hits Hank Baskett at the Bears’ 21. Buckhalter barrels to the 13. McNabb throws it on a short screen to Tony Hunt, who gets up to the 4. Buckhalter up to the 1. Correll gets smashed up at the 1, and the third down run is also stopped short.

Eagles time out. Garbage’s “Push It” for the bump music.

Andy Reid’s gonads were surgically removed. How do you go for it on 4th and 1 and run the EXACT SAME PLAY THAT DIDN’T WORK THREE TIMES BEFORE? Bears ball.

Note to Pizza Hut: It is not “mac ‘n cheese” unless you actually use, y’know, elbow macaroni pasta. Rotini doesn’t count.

3rd and 4, Forte busts out for a crucial first down to the 18 yard line. No more time outs for Philly now. Another short rush and we’re at the two minute warning.

Which is a worse choice of music for NFL commercials:

1) Everyday is Like Sunday – The Smiths


2) 32 Flavors – Ani DiFranco (2000) – Gibbon Jockey

I vote for the Smiths, only because I like that band. (Ani DiFranco can go die in a fire.) Both are equally bad in terms of songs to go with sporting events.

The Bears are rushing the ball to kill time, and Maynard is punting. He’ll take a time out as the play clock winds out, and we’ve got 28 seconds left. Jackson gets out of bounds at the 17, and McNabb has 18 seconds left to get 83 yards. McNabb hits Brown, but he’s in bounds, and that ends the game.

Your final is 24-20, Bears, and now both teams are 2-2.

Thanks for joining me, and see you next week for Steelers-Jaguars.

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