So we’re through the first day, and what have we learned?

About the Play by Play Guys:

1) James Brown might have a slight cold.
2) Kevin Harlan does not know a charge when he sees one.
3) Dick Enberg uses big words like Hemoglobin.
4) Gus Johnson likes to yell randomly.

About the Analysts:

1) Len Elmore is rarely excited.
2) Bob Wenzel is actually pretty good. No one’s ever heard of him though.
3) Jay Bilas is the king of the double entendre.
4) Dan Bonner rarely gets a word in over the yelling.

But of course we already knew #4. To tell you the truth no one was overwhelming bad or good Day One. James Brown and Lenny Elmore were good but subdued. Gus Johnson could turn a ballet into a Gwar concert. Kevin Harlan makes a good amount of mistakes but is pretty solid overall and knows his stuff.

Really the only team I was annoyed with was Enberg-Bilas. They started out fine, but slowly spiraled downward until Bilas started spewing lines like this….”It’s like your playing your dad in the driveway the way they get those 2nd chance points”. I have no idea what that even means.

So without further ado I give you Day 1….in quotes……

-“They had a four hour mechanical with their aircraft”- Kevin Harlan
-“Louisville looks to advance if they can hang onto this one”- Gus Johnson, The Cardinals were up 26 with 2 minutes left.
-“He loves to take you back-door after the timeouts”- Jay Bilas
-“You’ll find out why TV Guide calls Patrick Warrrrrrbarton hilarious”- Dick Enberg
-“It’s like your playing your dad in the driveway the way they get those 2nd chance points”- Jay Bilas
-“We might be a couple of seconds as they wipe up the drops of hemoglobin”- Dick Enberg
-“Jones is their best stroker from deep”- Bob Wenzel
-“And our second player of the game is Carl Elliot with 8 points”- James Brown
-“Coach K saw what we did, Paulus needs a blow”- Bob Wenzel
-“There is Greg Paulus, he has met his banging quota for the night.”- Bob Wenzel
-“Another limb has spawned from the coaching tree of Billy Donovan.”- Len Elmore
-“Aaron Gray is a great player and a great academician.”- Bob Wenzel

The highlight of the night though was by far and away the screen shot of which jerseys VCU and DUKE:

VCU- Black, DUKE- White

Of course they are….and you are RACISTS CBS! Go Rams!!!

See you tomorrow for Day 2! And you know who we get tomorrow right????

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