I am not a fan of golf. There I got that out of the way…..I like to play it, but I consider it a hobby and not a sport. Well the one thing I know about golf is that you don’t “F” with Tiger “I have Ice running through my veins, which are also made of Ice from Iceland (yes I know Iceland is green and Greenland is ice….but it sounded better. Work with me here.)” Woods. Don’t say I didn’t warn you Dubliner. What is your Rookie Card worth Gem Mint 10 Jose Maria Olazabal??? Huh??? (P.S.- Maria is a girl’s name)

Tiger Woods has reacted with fury after a Dublin magazine printed topless photos of a woman which it wrongly claimed it was the superstar golfer’s wife. Woods and the United States team are said to be “appalled” by the article in the latest issue of the Dubliner, which portrays the players’ wives and girlfriends as cheap on the eve of the Ryder Cup. The photograph purporting to be of Woods’s wife Elin Nordegren appears in the September issue of the listings magazine. Under the headline “Ryder Cup filth for Ireland” is a picture of a topless woman. (From the Daily Mail)

In fact the Dubliner didn’t stop with Tiger:

The article continues: “Most American golfers are married to women who cannot keep their clothes on in public. Is it too much to ask that they leave them at home for the Ryder Cup? “Consider the evidence – Tiger Woods’s wife Elin Nordegren – pictured left – can be found in a variety of sweaty poses on porn sites across the web…” But the photo is not of the 26-year-old Swedish model. Sources close to the American team said Woods was dismayed at the publication and other members of the US side were very unhappy. It goes on to claim that Chad Campbell’s wife Amy is a ” largechested singer” and suggests that Jim Furyk’s wife Tabitha ” married geeky Jim as his winnings hit £10 million”. The piece also says Sonya Toms, wife of David, finds it “liberating” to wear her bikini around the house.

Oh okay Ireland I see how it is! Not only did you make my decedents from there….you made me with your precious Red Hair and threw on a Ronald McDonald afro on my head from the time I’m born until about 11 years old. But being beat up by dickhead kids is nothing compared to trying to rile up my boy Tiger. I’m officially anti-Irish…..someone help me scrub these f’ing freckles off my skin now.

(I might actually watch the Ryder Cup now. Nah, probably not.)