The 2011 Pam Ward Chronicles: Week 2

pamwardchronicles
The Pam Ward Chronicles roll on for Week 2 of the college football season.  Some interesting games on the docket today including Penn State/Alabama, South Carolina/Georgia, and mediocre teams Notre Dame and Michigan getting the national spotlight under the lights in Ann Arbor for some reason.  Current Pammies leader Pam Ward (who else?) will be at Lexington for Central Michigan/Kentucky at noon on ESPNU.  We will update the Pammies as we can with your comments in the open thread and Tweets to us at AA throughout the day.  Use the hashtag #PWAA to send in submissions via Twitter or leave a comment below.  The nominees will come Monday for you to vote on and the winners will be announced on Wednesday.  You can check out the winners from last week and the full Week 2 announcing schedule below.  Here’s a couple quotes from last night to get us started.

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Week 1 Pammy Winners and Standings

Full Week 2 Announcing Schedule
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“It almost doesn’t matter if they make the field goal in a 16-10 game.” – Rod Gilmore (via Champ1192)

“6 foot 8 Brock Osweiler” – Joe Tessitore (via everyone) reminding us several times throughout last night’s telecast that yes, ASU QB Brock Osweiler is indeed a tall man.

“Texas Tech is the toughest test on Oklahoma State’s schedule.” – Craig James (via sctvman) OK State plays five ranked teams and Tech isn’t one of them.  Maybe it’s the beginning of his PR campaign in Lubbock. 

“Is there any place better to play and coach than illinois?” – Kevin Kugler (via Benjamin Bordeau)

“Oregon State kicked the ball backwards.” – Chris Spielman (via Powellabama) on a punt that went -4 yards from the line of scrimmage, but not backwards.

“BYU has a chance at getting to the #2 spot because of their defensive line.” – Trevor Matich (via sctvman) saying BYU has a chance at a spot in the BCS title game.  Matich is a BYU grad.

“Danny Travathan. Let’s make that a synonym for a great play.” – Pam Ward (via sctvman)

“If you take away a bad Oregon State punt and Russell Wilson this game is 0-0.” – Chris Spielman (via Schwizzy)

“That might be a game-saving stop.” – Dan Hawkins (via sctvman) with the game 13-6 CMU with 4:15 in the second quarter.

6:51 into game, John Sanders has called Maine “Buffalo,” Ronald Jones “Randall Jones” and possibly Todd Graham “Chris Graham.” (via Eric Knopsnyder)

“He’s been so cold I think he was out getting a hot dog” – Dan Hawkins with two analogies that make no sense when put together. (via CK29)

“Ohio State grabs momentum around the throat with that 69 yard punt return.” – Tom Hart (via myoder84)

“Sunseri likes to look right, and throw right.” – John Sanders (via sctvman)

“Michigan couldn’t beat Notre Dame even if Lee Corso played for Notre Dame”- Lou Holtz (via The Subway Domer)

“I don’t see them losing the rest of the year, they’re too talented.” – Lou Holtz on, you guessed it, Notre Dame.  Guess he missed last week’s home loss to USF.  (via KegsNEggs)

“A tale of two 15 minute games, or two quarters.” – Joel Klatt (via TweetsByVamosi)

“That was a very long one yard gain.” – John Thornton (via sctvman)

“It takes a special guy to hit that thing fast and hard everytime.” – Andre Ware (via DCare24)

“… is from right here in Louisville” – Pam Ward (via TheBlightning) calling the CM-UK game from Lexington.  How do you pronounce the capital of Kentucky?

“This drive right here might define the entire Kentucky season.” – Dan Hawkins (via Bryan Fischer)

“You can never have enough points in the first half.” – Andre Ware (via BR_CFB)

“Rutgers down by five, looking to get even.” – Steve Martin (via minapier)

“Its hard to win when your groceries are ugly” – Liam McHugh (via jleimer)

“In another life, I’m coming back as UGA’s mascot.” - Matt Millen (via sctvman)

John Elways has a lot of things. He still has a loss in the ’82 Big Game.”- Joe Starkey, Cal radio announcer (via KSJ49)

Ohio St won so you can’t say “Holy Toledo,” Mike. – Craig James (via CaptTouchback)

“They’re boa constrictors. They’re sqeezing the life out of Penn State.” – Todd Blackledge (via bmaze)

“This Triple Option offense gives you a lot of options” – Warrick Dunn (via sctvman)

“Julio Jones had 78 catches last year. Marquis Maze was the next closest with 38. That’s 30 more!” Todd Blackledge (via bjo109)

“Ingram is a hamburger shy of 280 pounds.” - Matt Millen (via sctvman)

“Right now he’d like to pitch the touchdown shutout; they gave up the field goal earlier” – Brad Nessler (via TheBlightning)

“The great play callers are great instinctual people.” - Matt Millen (via sctvman)

“You’re gonna see a very fast, and yet confident Marc Tyler - Glen Parker (via sctvman) teaching us that fast and confident are somehow contradictory terms.

“I gotta say we enjoyed being with Mike Tirico here the other night before he went down to Miami. And hey, atta boy Mike, he picked up the dinner for us, atta way to go, huh?” – Brent Musburger (via CK29) uttering a sentence that makes no sense during MNF promo.

“I ttalked to a few USC defenders, TJ McDonald, Robert Woods, and they all said Utah is tough.” Glenn Parker (via bjo109).  Robert Woods is a receiver.  He caught 17 passes last week.

“He (the RB) pushed it to the heavens.” – John Sadek (via sctvman)

“So Michigan will attempt to score when you come back for the money quarter. Denard Robinson…time to take it in again.” – Brent Musburger (via TheBlightning AND CK29)

“I believe he was out of bounds.” – Brent Musburger (via sctvman) as a ND receiver catches a ball six yards out of bounds.

“Michigan did not bring pressure, they brought pressure from the outside.” – Kirk Herbstreit (via Packey)

“Michigan wins it.” – Brent Musburger (via brewfangrb) with over a minute left in the game and Michigan up four points.  Notre Dame retook the lead less than a minute later.

Matt Yoder

About Matt Yoder

Managing Editor of Awful Announcing and award winning sportswriter. Bloguin consigliere. The biggest cat in the whole wide world.

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