Dallas Stars analyst and former longtime NHL goalie Daryl "Razor" Reaugh is one of the most interesting and popular local announcers working in professional sports today. During Thursday night's game against the Carolina Hurricanes, he described a Jamie Benn goal in a way which I can safely guarantee has never been heard before. Reaugh described Benn skating between two defenders as the following:
"And then… like poop through a diarrhea infected goose, Benn goes through everyone."
I'm not overreacting when I say this. That may be the single greatest sentence ever uttered on a sports telecast. Razor Reaugh is my hero.
He doesn't laugh, he doesn't crack up, he doesn't stop dead in his tracks. He just keeps going forward like that's a completely normal thing to say about a hockey goal! Although I've never closely inspected a diarrhea infected goose before, I have to assume that Reaugh is basically correct in his assessment. After all, that was a very… explosive move by Benn.
Thank you, I'll be here all week.