If there's anything left in sports that surpasses the absurdity of the Pro Bowl… it's Super Bowl Media Day.  The Tuesday before the big game has become a circus Barnum and Bailey would be proud to call their own.  Every year, players and coaches from both conference champions are paraded in front of podiums and forced to answer the dumbest and most insignificant questions possible.  Nothing quite says "Super Bowl Experience" like someone asking Michael Crabtree what kind of lunchbox he had as a kid.

The entire "spectacle" has devolved into who can be the strangest costume wearing weirdo and which celebrity of the moment can draw the most attention to themselves.  Poor Ines Sainz must have been so lonely this year with all the cameras and microphones shoved in Katherine Webb's face.  All Ines could muster was an awkward looking hug from Mike Pereira.

I actually attempted to watch 15 minutes of NFL Network's live Media Day coverage.  First Take is less excruciating than seeing Deion Sanders walk up to the podium, completely oblivious to everything else around him, and interrupt the proceedings.  Ok, I take that back, nothing is as excruciating as First Take.  Still, it made for painful television that produced absolutely nothing of value.

Can you think of any quote remotely interesting or insightful said at Super Bowl Media Day this year?  This tweet from SI.com's Tom Mantzouranis sums up the fountain of real information that flows from the podiums each and every year.

I can't even get too excited about Randy Moss calling himself the greatest receiver of all-time, because it's like not even in the Top 500 interesting things Randy Moss has ever said.  What are the other headlines to come out of this year's Media Day?  It's ok, I'll wait.

Ray Lewis saying he forgives Wes Welker's wife?  Thank God we can move beyond that national crisis.

Colin Kaepernick kissing his bicep again?  Next!

Joe Flacco saying he wish he wouldn't have said the word "retarded"?  You don't say.

I kid you not, Dennis Pitta talking about being "moderately ticklish"?

Sad Alex Smith is sad?  All over the country the internet's best memeologists are already feverishly copying oversized bold white font from grumpy cat pictures and attaching them to this photograph.  The height of creativity, is it not?

sadalexsmith

GET IT!  Alex Smith looks grumpy!!!  Oh the memeability of all that delicious memeyness…

Hey look, it's Rick Reilly!  I wonder if these fine folks asked him if he broke any big Media Day scoops on Twitter.  How amazing that the media would be interviewing the media about the media on Media Day..

And that's Media Day in a nutshell.  It's not about the players or the game.  It hasn't been for quite some time.  It's nothing more than a look-at-me carnival that no respectable media member would have anything to do with.  It's little more than an insult to real practicing media.  You can't even get a serious recap of what the players said at Media Day anymore.  Isn't that the whole point of a day dedicated to interviewing these guys?  Look around – NFL.com, USA Today, Sports Illustrated, ESPN, etc. all have live blogs and articles about the circus of Media Day.  Fox even has a Girls of Media Day Gallery!  In fact, Media Day may be the most perfect day in all of sports for a Bleacher Report slideshow!

Media Day needs to go away.  Permanently.  It serves no purpose other than to give the Super Bowl a comedic sideshow, just without the laughs.  As if the hype dragging out for two weeks for the Super Bowl wasn't bad enough, there's Media Day to make the time go even slower.  It's like dropping Movie 43 into the middle of The Godfather and asking you to pretend it somehow makes sense.  

The real honest to goodness media can get their cliches and quotes any other time and we'll all move ahead just fine.  Call me a curmudgeon, but if there was actually one benefit, one laugh, even a mild chuckle that came from Media Day I could see the worthwhileness of it all.

Instead, it's nothing more than a clown show.  No, really…