Breaking: Craig James concedes shock defeat in Texas Senate Primary


In what could be the biggest political shocks in American history… no, in the history of democracy going back to the Ancient Greeks, Craig James has unbelievably lost his bid to become the Republican nominee for the United States Senate in Texas.  With his football career and experience as a college football announcer, James’ experience was well-suited for service in the United States congress.  If Jesse Ventura could become a Governor, why not Craig James for the Senate?  With his “Real Street” message and promises to stand up to buillies and make-believe evil, James was just beginning to connect with Texas voters as his support inched forward in recent polls.  

And tonight, suddenly, the dream has died.  Craig James has conceded.

With 37% of precincts reporting and counting, James has received 4% of the vote in Texas.  How could this have happened?  Where did it all go wrong???

Matt Yoder

About Matt Yoder

Managing Editor of Awful Announcing and award winning sportswriter. Comeback Media consigliere. The biggest cat in the whole wide world.