The 2011 Pam Ward Chronicles Week 5

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Pam Ward’s run in the chronicles that bear her name is temporarily halted this week as she’s away on WNBA duty.  That opens the door for Gary Danielson, Matt Millen, and Craig James to catch up in the standings.  It should be an awesome day of college football, which follows the Australian Football Grand Final that I’m sure you were all up watching till the wee hours of the morning.  Leave us with all the best and most awful quotes you hear throughout this football Saturday and we’ll put it to a vote on Monday.

Week 5 Announcing Schedule Week 4 winners and updated standings _________________________________________________

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“Dave Wannstedt did a great job here at Pittsburgh” – Craig James (via many people).  Wanny never reached a BCS bowl and was 42-31 as a coach.

“Bands playing, excitement in the air, that’s what happens when conference play comes around.” - Rece Davis (via Sctvman) 

“I see it on film. Skip Holtz’s team is playing better between the lines.” - Craig James (via bjo109)… as opposed to playing better out of bounds?

Tino Sunseri has to play with a “fast clock in his head gear tonight.” - Jesse Palmer (via sctvman)

“Darrell Scott has a lot to prove and you can hear that proving when his body hits others.” – Craig James (via bjo109)

“USF have been lacked with a big physical runner.” – Jesse Palmer, you have been lacked with 3rd grade English. (via bjo109)

“To upset Wisconsin, Nebraska has to outscore them.” – Lee Corso (via sctvman)

“He went for the legs and got air.  Resulting in a first down.” – Randy Cross (via SkinsCapsTerps)

Brian Griese: “The way I remember the Legends is the Ms, the Ns, and Iowa.”
Clay Matvick: “Then how do you figure out the Leaders?”
Uhh… everyone who’s not in the Legends? (via tomatpsu)

“Northwestern in the white uniforms, Illinois in the red.” – Beth Mowins (via Chicago_Illini)

“Got it splatted back in his face.” – Bill Land (via MasseyOnTheCall)

“Remember Persa tore his achillies in the last regular season game last year”. – Randy Cross (via glokkenspx) Wrong.  Third to last game.

“Get the 1st down, win the game” – Urban Meyer (via sjwest86) with 13 minutes left in the game.

“Sharks may be in water, but I dont know if their instincts are working” – Randy Cross (via SkinsCapsTerps).  Apparently one of Navy’s slogans is sharks in the water.

“If you’re long, you’re never wrong.” – Chris Spielman (via sctvman)

“Stephens says, ‘Pick up your athletic supporter at about the 25 yard line!’ What a move!” – Dave Lapham (via HarveyMireles)

“Channeling their inner Charles Schultz here, Lucy pulling ball off tee.” – Randy Cross (via SkinsCapsTerps)

“about to start the 3rd qtr and Kentucky is up big 28-0 over the Kentucky Wildcats.” – Dave Neal (via djsevem)

“SEC football presented by Hyundai.” – While CBS is showing AF – Navy. (via SkinsCapsTerps)

“That’s the sound of pods papping.” – John Sanders (via smedindy) at the Case Western/Allegheny game.  D-III power!

“It’s a Persa party in Champaign today!” – Beth Mowins (via chadder)

“If you kick here you’re still down by two touchdowns.” – Randy Cross (via SkinsCapsTerps) as Navy was kicking to make it 28-17.

“Indiana with a golden opportunity…” – Clay Matvick (via Chris Schenkel) after taking over at their own 2.

Paul Burmeister: “Shaun, what do you like about Kellen Moore?”
Shaun King: “He is really good.”
Thanks, Shaun. (via bjo109) 

“That’s not a way to win winning football.” – Brian Griese (via Chris Schenkel)

“Kendall Gill’s first victory came against Georgia Tech.” – Dave Lapham (via bjo109)  Close, Kendall Gill was an NBA player.  Turner Gill is the football coach.

“…And under the bright lights. We saw a lot of bright lights players here today.” – Eric Collins (via Packey)

“Plenty of distance.” – Spero Dedes on the Auburn 21 yard FG attempt to take a 3-0 lead.

“The one-inch yard line.” – Steve Beuerlein (via sctvman)

“Regardless of who they have at running back, they both really depend on the offensive line.” – Matt Millen (via schmitty418)

“And we’re headed for overtime!” – Mike Gleason (via A_Zuckerman) after Rutgers brings an INT to the Syracuse 35 and 15 seconds left in the game.

“Quan Bray was wide open, which gave the perception that he was wide open.” – Steve Beuerlein (via BenBragg)

“Could have been a completion had he caught the ball.” – Matt Millen (via kbrownatc)

“Well the strategy is what it is.” – Steve Beuerlein (via Chris Schenkel).  Thanks, Steve.

“K-State forced a fumble on a kickoff, but they also gave up a 50-yard return, so they’re 1-for-1 on kicks.” – Bob Davie (via JVAPxP)

“If Bill Snyder kicks that extra point, it’s 22:19.” – Bob Davie (via MasseyOnTheCall) when Kansas State was down 21-19, went for 2 instead PAT.

“He’s so cool. It seems hard for him to get that emotional.” – Lou Holtz (via AlexFromBuffalo) on… of all people… Mike Gundy.

“Coach Patterson trying to call timeout. Don’t do that! You don’t have any!” – Dave Ryan (via MasseyOnTheCall)

“There is little doubt that the crowd tonight will exceed capacity… being $90,000 dollars, 90,000 fans I beg your pardon” – Verne Lundquist (via CraigJOlson)

“There is a good possibility one of these teams will suffer their first loss.” – Gary Danielson (via ATLNagel) in a game featuring unbeaten Florida vs unbeaten Alabama.

“Russell Wilson would rather do figure eights behind the line than to cross the line.” – Desmond Howard (via bjo109)

“As someone who rode the Pam Am stock to 0, I may wait a few weeks before jumping on board” – Brent Musburger (via sctvman), always the gambler.

“It’s like, you’re one of the guys who carries the bullets, then all the sudden, you have the musket.” – Gary Danielson (via sctvman)

“Here’s Driskel now for the Gators. he’s a 6’4, 235..uhhh…yard freshman.” – Verne Lundquist (via bjo109)

“If LSU isn’t number one, they’re number two behind Oklahoma and Alabama” – Brent Musburger (via sctvman)

“Nice throw but it was overthrown by a foot and a half.” – Gary Danielson (via bjo109)

“One of the ways to play is to put your best guys on the field.” – Gary Danielson (via cubsncards)

“Ball continues bringing the hammer” – Brent Musburger (via biggriff78)

“Luck is a big, strong guy. he goes in there with the trees and cows.” – Brian Baldinger (via bjo109)

Matt Yoder

About Matt Yoder

Managing Editor of Awful Announcing and award winning sportswriter. Bloguin consigliere. The biggest cat in the whole wide world.

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