I had an argument this summer with a couple of guys at a bar who vehemently disagreed with me that Notre Dame was on its way out as a college football fan favorite. They pointed to their broadcasting rights contract with NBC, their history as a football powerhouse, and their rabid fan base as reasons why they remain in good shape.
I, of course, conceded that Rudy is one of the world’s greatest films, but I pointed to the fact that they haven’t had a truly successful year in over a decade, that they’ve been living off of their Fighting Irish ancestors’ success for too long, and that I have never met a Notre Dame fan under the age of 30 who did not go to the school as reasons why they are falling off the map.
To make a long story short, this guy is the most stubborn person I know, so I decided to bring the argument to an end by kicking him in the gut and dropping a Stone Cold Stunner on his ass while one of my many fans tossed me a six-pack to drink all at once. I walked out of the restaurant with my middle fingers held high and my entrance song playing loud.
Well, that conversation happened months ago, and I planned on burying it alive for good… until today when the smart people that agree with me about Notre Dame picked up a trump card: Notre Dame fans are literally crazy. Not “I’m going to paint my chest gold even though it’s 15 degrees outside and scream like Jonah Hill in Accepted while USC beats us by 30″ crazy. More like “God punished Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio for beating us by giving him a heart attack only hours after the game” crazy.
Sheesh. For a school trying desperately to hang on to its college football relevancy, this is not a good look at all. Sure, people joke that football is like religion in certain areas of the country, but no one, other than Notre Dame fans, actually believe that football IS religion. Notre Dame fans, get a hold of yourselves and realize that more crazies mean fewer fans.
In the meantime, I’ll be wearing my championship belt from now on… and that’s the bottom line cuz Stone Cold/Jared Smith said so.
UPDATE: God must not have been that mad. Dantonio was released from the hospital today.