Welcome back to our weekly installment of The Pam Ward Chronicles. I’m going to be keeping track of the Announcing Quotes throughout the day and I ask that you join in. Please leave any that you come across in the comments or feel free to email me at AwfulAnnouncing@Gmail.com. Other goodness will be happening underneath this post so be sure to check it out.

We’re starting with some reader submissions from the last night’s game and I’ll see for the twelve o’clock games in a few.

Your College Football Announcing Schedule: Week Eight
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Chris Spielman:
“Louisville has a 3rd and 3 and UConn has been great
on third down defense tonight”.

Obviously Chris wasn’t looking at a stat sheet as at that point UL had
CONVERTED 10 of 15.
(Via Steve)

In the game tonight, Stoner (Rob Stone) just reported that Louisville coach Steve Kragthorpe was ‘swinging both ways’. I’m all for in-depth reporting, but this is a bit much… (3rd quarter, at approx. the 11:30 mark)
(Via Todd)

Ummmm what’s going on here Kentucky?

“When he sees a crease he’s up in there.”- Desmond Howard

Me too Desmond…me too.

“They gave up 31 points to Troy and Brad Pitt wasn’t the coach of that team.”- Lee Corso

“Seven teams are on the cusp of eligbilly.”- Ray Bentley

Pam actually laughed at him after that one. I thought she was incapable of emotion.

I know this is too easy…But Ray Bentley just called a Purdue player “The best receiving tight end in the country” (Via Matt)

Still funny though.

“Murray is able to get it through for three yards….three points rather.”- Pam Ward

“They [the Purdue Breakfast Club] lined up at 7 AM to get some of their…favorite beverages.” – Pam Ward, trying desperately not to make any references to alcohol. (Via S2N)

“Welcome to Floyd Casey Stadium in Baylor, Texas”. Play-by-Play Man Ron Thulin at the 7:12 mark in 1st quarter (not realizing he is in Waco.) (Via BG)

“Good timeout by Penn State…you may catch them in a ball handling situation.”- Andre Ware

“Who do you like in this Big Ten Deal?”- Ray Bentley
“Well I don’t think anyone is going to go undefeated. We’re over here with Ohio State…they’re the last one in the conference.”- Bob Griese

Umm no Bob….that’s wrong.

“Christensen lucky that one wasn’t almost batted away.”- Pam Ward

Uhhh Pam…it was. Do you mean intercepted? I’m confused.

“You had facial hair for quite a few years.” – Pammy
“Yeah, I had a Fu Manchu going on for a while there. A mustache is a big part of a man’s identity. You shave it off, you almost feel naked.” – Bentley
“Well, you shaved yours off. Do you feel naked right now?” – Pammy
“No. I feel young.” – Bentley

I never want to hear Pam Ward ask anyone if they feel naked ever again. (Via S2N)

Oh don’t worry…..you know I have video coming from that one! Is there some “in-booth” chemistry going on with Pam and Ray?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmy0C2ADG_8

John Saunders said something like this on the pregame show on abc…should be a tough game, ucla only had that hiccup against Notre Dame. Hmmm…maybe you forgot when they got shlacked vs UTAH 44-6!! (Via Mike)

“This is a huge turning point play in this game.”- Bob Griese

It’s 49 seconds in Bob….I think we can wait a bit.

At the start of the 2nd quarter of the Ohio St-Mich St game, Bob Griese made reference to Brad Nessler’s pink tie. Nessler says “Thank you, it’s for breast awareness month.”

Actually, it’s breast CANCER awareness month. I like to think EVERY month is breast awareness month. (Via Corey)

Hahaha….speaking of “Awareness”….what’s Erin Andrews up to today?

Nice…a little shawl type thingy. Such style.

“Think about playing quarterback here at USC: Carson Palmer wins a Heisman, Matt Leinart wins a Heisman, John David Booty has played very well, and now Mark Sanchez. It’s like going out as a runway model after Heidi Klum.” – Pat Haden (Via S2N)

“That one looked like you were ordering an omelet at breakfast it was so open.”- Gary Danielson
(pause)
“You ain’t seen nothing yet.”-Verne Lundquist

What the hell are they even talking about?

“There was a big hole — Will Ferrell could have run through that hole.” – Pat Haden, He wants to get on the scoreboard badly. (Via S2N)

I’m glad someone’s watching Notre Dame for me.

“When sholder goes down the umph goes South.”- Verne Lundquitst

“11 points is better than 12” – Gary Danielson (Anon-just give him the trophy now)

“Buckeyes almost double the Spartans in yardage, 348 to 112.”- Marty Bannister, OSU Radio Announcer (Via Anon)

Is there anything worse for an announcer to say then, “Dufrene gives Mendenhall a blow” – Brent Musburger
(Via Keyser Soze)

“South Florida will be replaced in the 2-hole.” Brent Musberger (Via Gangsta D)

“The guys say he is so precious with the young boys.”- Holly Rowe (Via Gangsta D)

“If he bobbles the ball at all, and it falls incomplete, it’s over. You leave a timeout in your bag, the season — done.” — Mike Patrick, in the final seconds of LSU’s victory

If the pass was incompelte, the clock would have stopped with :03 (or at fewest :02) left! This comment makes no sense! (Via Anon)

“If that would’ve been a completion, that would’ve been a really great throw-and-catch.”- Jay Taylor (Via Eric)

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