Of K-Balls and Whatnot

I don’t know about you, but I have a pretty immature sense of humor (must be why I hate British people). If you didn’t already know……the ‘Boys are apparently blaming Romo’s botched hold on the NFL’s special kicker ball, or K-Balls. While it appears that this could be the case (I noted at the time that the ball looked “brand new”) it’s all a little after the fact. Why hasn’t anyone said anything before now?

Well, all this K-Ball talk cracks me up because no one says the K….they just say balls. So here’s a collection of lovely quotes from the NFL’s finest…..

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“The Balls are not good balls for performing football duties — catching, holding, kicking, punting.”- New Orleans Saints kicker John Carney

“The balls, it’s like they’re coming in a Brinks truck. It’s the darndest thing you’ve ever seen. And they’re guarded. Now the kickers complained, but statistically nothing changed too much. We evaluate that. At least we knew it wasn’t going to be filled with helium.”- Seahawks coach Mike Holmgren

“These balls are handled by special ball boys and are kept separated from the regular game balls, even though they are the same.”- Former NFL Ref Jerry Markbreit

“The balls the quarterbacks use, they’ll take them down, they’ll rub them, they’ll break them in, and use them throughout the week to have them not be so new.”- Giants Kicker Jay Feely

“The reason this was put in place was to prevent teams from doctoring balls for kicking,” League Spokesman Greg Aiello

“The balls are very, very slick. They have a lot of wax on them because they are brand new. You don’t get to work them in very much, and you see a lot of that happening.”- Eagles Kicker David Akers

……and my personal favorite…..

“They’re slicker than the plastic balls my kids play with.”- Eagles Long Snapper Mike Bartrum

Oh god….I slay me sometimes. Good times….good times. Just the imagery of balls being shipped in by Brinks trucks made my day.

***Update***- From Wasting Company Time

On “Inside the NFL” on HBO they are discussing the cowboys-seahawks game and of course they mentioned the dropped hold on the FG attempt. Then they started talking about the K-balls, someone mentioned rubbing the balls, and they all completely lost it.

Someone send me that video! I need more laughs!!!

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