So with an Announcing troupe as stellar as Dan Patrick, Greg Anthony, Jay Bilas, Stephen A. Smith, Stu Scott, Rachel Nichols, Dickie V, Fran Fraschilla, Steve Jones, and a random Jim Gray you knew I’d have some gems for you today. Here they are Clint Eastwood Style.

The Good:

“Teams in the SEC didn’t even guard him”- Jay Bilas on Rondo.
“Golden State is like a donut. They have everything but that middle”- Greg Anthony, This was a well thought out jab.
“Dan I was sitting in the back listening to your pithy comments waiting for you to say something nice about our draft picks”- Stern to Dan Patrick, Stern is obviously not a fan of the newly Dyed Dan Patrick
“Rodman was 6’9” guarding centers….not 6’6”.”- Greg Anthony in response to Bilas’ comment that Balkman is a Rodman/Artest Type.
“He keeps both teams in the game”- Dan Patrick on Spanish Chocolate
“Looks like Mark Jones just took a charge from a fan”-DP, “Yea, Eminem”-JB on Mark Jones interview with Knicks’ Fans in the crowd., Jay Bilas was on his game…especially when throwing awkward racial comments at Knicks fans.

The Bad:

“What did Simone Augustus tell you about this night?”- Stu Scott to Tyrus Thomas I have no comment for this whatsoever.
“Late Bloomer…wants to be a chef. Well he’s cooking now in the Bay Area”- DP on Patrick O’Bryant. Just terrible.
“Looks to shoot first and pass 3rd, 4th, and 5th.”-JB describing Quincy Douby I’ve analyzed this one over and over, and I still don’t understand what Quincy does 2nd?
“He’s a sleeper”- Spike Lee describing Balkman
“Jordan is most definitely in the decision process.”- Rachel Nichols on Charlotte
“Metallica is coming to ChaTown.”- Stu Scott on Morrison going to Charlotte Where exactly is ChaTown? Please don’t let this be a trend like the “Nation” crap. I can’t bear anymore Raptors Nation talk.
“It’s gonna be an Awesome Baby Year in the NCAAs. I’ve got to go to bed.”- Dickie V
“Only three teams called his agent.”- Fran Fraschilla on Minnesota’s Loukas Mavrokefalidis
“Isiah is good in the draft I will say THAT much”- SAS, He said this 40 times apparently keeping the door open for Isiah to come back on his show and make fun of Bill Simmons. Speaking of Bill Simmons…..

Side Note: I know I’ve been ragging on Simmons a lot lately and I think I’ve had the final straw. A staple every draft has been his Draft Diary, which he is in the tenth year doing. Well if you haven’t read it this year….Don’t. There is no analysis on the players, zero funny/witty comments, and he weeps through the page about not getting Foye. The thing was a total of nine printed pages in giant ESPN font…..I had 11 pages in 10pt font!?!?! And he’s the professional? Riiight….Bill Simmons has officially jumped the shark. Okay rant over….

….and…..drumroll please….The Ugly:

“I haven’t seen him play that much.”- SAS on Rudy Gay Just tell the entire world you’re an ass right now. One of the best players in the draft, and you haven’t even seen him play?!?! I bet you have great insight on Hotam Yalperin then.
“Randy Foye…raised by his grandmothers. Talk about a difficult situation.”- Dan Patrick This was a very awkward comment at the time because he gave us no background at all.
“It’s like a Lids store at the mall with a 2 for 1 Sale”-JB describing the trades.
“Get your mom game up. I’ll do anything for my children as long as it’s legal.”- Ms. Williams,mom of Marcus Williams.
“They like a lot of what you are saying on the set.”- Rachel Nichols on Adam Morrison. Thanks for YOU’RE opinion Rach.
“He was spotted bagging groceries.”- Dan Patrick on Joel Freeland

….and my personal favorite courtesy of one Rachel Alexander Nichols….
“Why are you here right now?”- Rachel Nichols to the Best Basketball Player of All-time.

Do you even ask that to any athlete? Nevertheless, to His Airness? Seriously, Mike can you get Oak on the phone and call in a hit? As you can probably tell I haven’t really liked her up until now, but that’s just ridiculous. Another thing that is crazy….She never blinks! Ever! It’s crazy….check it out sometime. Welcome to the AA HOF Mrs. Nichols.